Slowing down....

A week nvr update my blog liao…. Too much thing happens to me which make me slow down a lot a lot….

For the pass few days, I doing nothing in practical. Just eat, sleep and play and nothing else. Nothing different from a useless person.

What did I reali did is just taking a basketball and go down to BMCC to train my basketball and nothing else. I reali feel that I am a FUCKING SORE LOSER! When I lose, I blame other. I mean I am that kind of person that dun like to face the truth. Example: when lose; I blame other but not myself. And I blame the laptop brand and price suck when I can’t sell. Which make me a sore loser?

I always got my 101 reasons or excuse to say that HEY I not in the wrong. But for myself, I know who right and wrong. I cant do anything good in this world. People always tell me to endure and wait but well, just face the fact, I am reali fucking loser or what la. What I am now is cause by what I did last time.

Just think of what Jessica say me maybe is right.

Look – I am FUCKing overweight
Character – I am a sore loser, bad temper, and inpatient
Money – I got fucking none of it
Future – all I know is “ALL TALK NO ACTION” plan

I always say I want to do something big and prove that I better than Chee bye Tha* and bastard **(Those who close to me will know they is). What if I better than them? What did I successed in? Fucking tired. Because they are two BIG burden forces I to change my life style to be better than them. Damn!! I am getting nowhere now.

I reali jealous of both of them. Why?

They can play basketball well which I can’t.
They can FUCK girl here and there which I can’t
They can be forgiven when they do something wrong BECAUSE THEY ARE HANDSOME
They got a fuck up attitude but still got friend around him

I reali dun understand why the world is all about. And never will understand it.
Seeing my entire friends moving on with their life make me think of a lot of thing. Why cant I put down my past and move on? Just hope that my life could go back to 2007Jan.

I wish that I never do stupid thing which I do before
I wish that I never know Bastard **
I wish that I never know Chee bye Tha*
I wish that I never went to eat with Feng at 2007 June IT fair last day so i wont get the ice cream ……..

Then everything will be perfect for me I guess….. Just guess that everything I do is late for me now. I cant blame anyone. Face It that i am just a loser. I cannot turn back now but Only tear are left behind me….